The Eve Before Legality

I don't know how time has managed to pass so quickly but it needs to stop so I can think for a minute. I need a twix moment. Internet, I am turning 21 in approximately one hour and seven minutes. It's 10:53 pm EST). 21!! That means I've been alive (presumably doing something significant) for over two decades now!! Insanity! Maybe someone will give me a Nobel Prize in Medicine/Physiology for my extraordinary efforts in hoping to discover the cure to cancer by my third decade. And maybe they'll give me one for all the extraordinary effort I put into being the bundle of joy that I am. They can call that the Prize for Badassery. I don't know about the necessary qualifications but hey it sounds just about as legitimate as the Nobel Prize for Literature. Burn. Haha, I kid. I love to read but I just can't imagine the conversations the nominees at the committee must have. The science people would be like: "So, I discovered a new target for retroviruses so we can develop more advanced drugs to treat HIV/AIDS. Why are you here?" And the literature people would be like..."Oh...I'm here because I write real pretty and stuff. Yeah..." And then there would be a huge awkward silence and everyone would make excuses to leave like, "Oh this conversation was delightful but I think that plant over there is puking. I should go hold its hair back so it doesn't get vomit on its new black dress." and then pretend that exchange never happened.

ANYWAY, to get back on topic. 21. You know what? I never make a huge sentimental deal about birthdays but for some reason this one felt slightly different. Mostly because as I was doing my Logic homework, I had this realization that after today, I could never again enjoy the delights of an illegally purchased drink. The things I used to take for granted! After I realized that, I just had to have one last one for old times sake. Sort of like Jesus's last supper only on a much smaller but equally significant scale. You see, Jesus had a last dinner with his disciples to spread on final words of wisdom. This last drink is the equivalent of telling my liver with tears glistening in my eyes, 'Man, you and I, we go back. You were there for me when I needed you the most when my ear became an alcoholic. Thanks for all your hard work. I love you man.' and my liver would smile politely and do a terrorist fist bump with me but secretly be thinking, 'I need a new host ASAP.' And next thing I know, I'll see ads for liver transplants on Adsense. My liver is the Judas of my body.

So, here it is in all of its improperly focused glory ladies and gentlemen. The final drink. Picture taken courtesy of my terrible camera.

In case you couldn't tell (I would be surprised if you could), its a bottle of grape flavored soju. I was convinced for a while that this thing was not in fact alcohol and that the world was playing a practical joke on me because it tasted uncannily like Grape Fanta. Only when the familiar sleepiness kicked in did I realize... I was a fool for doubting! So today I bid farewell to the rush of adrenaline you get as you walk up to purchase alcohol at the counter. Farewell to the days of praying that I looked older than my 14 year old face. Today I say a fond farewell to the days of being 20.